It All Gets Done in the End

I know that my kids won't be kids for long; and before they reach the age where they fly the coop, they will still be kids but won't want to be at home with mom and dad all the time. Payton is 7, almost 8, and she loves to be over at her friend Jentry's house or have Jentry over here. Either way, we don't see her until snacks or a meal are being served. My boys are just 3 (almost 4) and 1 (almost 2). They still have a few years until they are where Payton is, but I know they are coming. My goal as a mom is to remember that my children will only be children for a finite period of time. The objectives of reaching that goal is to remember that they don't want a mom who is always tired from cleaning, folding laundry, cooking dinner, cleaning up after dinner and then being more than axious for them to get in bed so I can clean the family room and finally have a second to sit down and unwind. Because I work outside of the home, the weekends are when I usually try to catch up on chores.


Yesterday, Saturday, was a different day for me. I made a concerted effort to just let it be. I kept thinking, don't spend the time now to do all of this. The kitchen was a mess, there were four baskets of laundry that needed to be folded and beds needed to be made. I chose to ignore it and sit on the couch and play with my baby. Eli and I had the best 20 minutes that we've had in a long time. Benjamin was sleeping and Roy had taken Payton and Jentry to a local sporting goods store. Eli and I laughed and talked and kissed and just loved on each other. It was the sweetest time between mother and son, and tears are coming to my eyes as I type this. I have Eli to thank for the realization that what we did together is what MATTERS. I mean, I knew in theory, that that's what mattered but now I have experienced it. I don't mean to sound like the mom who has three kids and just feeds, shelters and clothes them. I have had some really sweet times with my other two as well, but in the back of my mind I was always worried how I was going to get my "stuff" done. Eli won't remember those 20 minutes but I will. I will also remember that I was still able to spend time with my child and look forward to so many more moments like that with Eli as well as with Benjamin and Payton.

Today, I believe that Roy had the same sort of experience with Benjamin. They left shortly after church and went to the woods and stomped around and did what boys do in the woods. They were gone several hours and Roy kept telling me what a good time that they had. Eli was here with me while Payton had to go back to her mother's house. While Eli took his nap, I was able to get my housework done. I can't be dishonest and say that having an orderly house isn't important to me, and I think children thrive in a structured home; but they thrive moreso on love and attention. And as I sit here and type this post, my kitchen floors are clean, sheets have been changed, laundry folded and put away, but MOST IMPORTANTLY, Roy and I both had some really good moments with our children. I have now learned what will come first, because the other stuff all gets done in the end.

Blessings,

Leslie

Or...

...maybe I'm so exhausted in the mornings because I spend the wee hours of the night wrestling with my 3-year-old who has once again snuck into bed with me. Like he did last night. I woke up at 2:00 this morning after Benjamin had managed to simultaneously kick me in the gut and hit me in the face. Once I woke up to take him back to his bed, I realized that I hadn't really slept because I had spent most of the night trying to avoid what Benjamin ended up accomplishing - beating the you-know-what out of his mamma while we slept. He, of course, is none the wiser since he is sleeping peacefully and comfortably knowing that he is snuggled next to his mom. He is completely unaware of the tears of pain and exhaustion that I'm trying to hold back while I lift my lil' heavyweight back to his own boxing ring.

Discipline

So the title of this post has more to do with me than with my children... I realize that my whole idea of blogging was really to provide my kids a virtual scrapbook of their childhood as well as my and Roy's thoughts and feelings. A very intergral part of scrapbooking, whether it be virtual or real, is photographs. This is where the discipline comes in. Roy and I don't need discipline it TAKING pictures. The discipline is need in DOWNLOADING the pictures. So this is the second day of my new blog and I haven't picture one on here. I realize it's only my second night to post anything, but I really need to get in the habit of downloading the pictures that I've taken. So I have taken a pledge to use this holiday weekend as an opportunity to take LOTS of pictures as well as post them on my blog! Wow - what a novel idea.

Come to think of it, there are many areas of my life that need discipline. As I sit here and type this post, I am so tired that I don't think I can move anything but my fingers. I need to be better about going to bed sooner than I have been. I used to be a morning person. Even when I was a child I was always the first one awake. I was never that kid that slept past 8:00 am. As a teenager, I rarely slept past 10:00 am unless I had an "all nighter" slumber party or something. I always felt that if I slept past 10:00 half of the day was gone and I didn't like that feeeling. Well things have changed since I have had kids. One would think that with having children you would go to bed earlier instead of later. That used to be the case when my boys were infants because I wasn't running on a full tank of gas if you know what I mean. Getting up every two hours (Eli) really did a number on me for several months so I went to bed whenever I had the opportunity. Now that all of my kids are sleeping through the night I usually use the hours of 9:00 to 11:00 to "prowl" as my pastor's wife calls it. This is when I can unwind, fold laundry, catch up on my DVR'd episodes of Top Chef and The Next Food Network Star. Oh, ok I'll admit it now - and The Real Housewives of (Insert name of major city here). There I feel much better. Now where was I? Oh yeah prowling. Anywho, I revel in that time that I have the whole house to myself. Roy typically goes to bed around 9:00 or 9:30. He's a good example of self discipline. He goes to bed early so he can get up early and have his quiet time to study and read the scriptures before the kids get up. That's what I'm trying to do, but I lack the discipline! When my alram goes off at 5:30 I cringe. I have a hard time going to bed with dirty dishes in the sink and "things" out-of-place. Everything has to be "just so" or as close to "just so" as it can get. I am definitely a Martha. You know, the two sisters Mary and Martha. Jesus came over to their house and Mary sat at Jesus' feet while Martha flittered around the house trying to make everything "just so." Jesus didn't care what the house looked like. He wanted Martha to sit at his feet and listen to him. Although I can't literally sit at Jesus' feet today, I can sit at His feet by reading the word of God. I need to be a Mary and not a Martha. Some things are just more important than others and getting rest (even God rested) and studying the word of God should be the most important things on our "to do" lists.

So I'll try tonight (again) to go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and have my quiet time. I'll keep you posted on how it's going!

Blessings,

Leslie